How To Find The Balance Between Self Acceptance vs Self Improvement

What self-acceptance does is open up more possibilities of succeeding because you aren’t fighting yourself along the way - Shannon Ables

Personal Development can be filled with paradoxes and sometimes it can be confusing where to begin.

Does this sound familiar?

You have a dream for your future but no matter how hard you try you seem to stay stuck not moving forward or you are on a roundabout trying new strategies but eventually you keep coming back to the same old place?

In a way self improvement can be a bit like building a house on sand, no matter how great the kerb appeal of the four bedroom detached (insert house preference here) looks like on the outside and whatever postal code area your house is located, unless it is built on firm foundations there will be subsidence along the way. 

Our self discovery journey can be a bit like that house as we are trying to build a life on shaky ground. In order for us to connect to our inner confidence, the first priority is to establish a firm foundation. That firm foundation is "Our Core Self" it is so important to know who we are, what we want, and what we are capable of.

And that journey can begin with self love and acceptance. Until we accept ourselves as we are now and love ourselves unconditionally for the wonderful and beautiful souls that we are, we will constantly seek out ways to affirm those shaky limiting beliefs and therefore stay stuck in the sinking feelings of...... i.e ''I am not good enough'', ''I will never achieve anything'', ''I am not worthy of success''.


I sincerely feel that self-improvement begins by loving and accepting yourself - not depending or accepting solely the love of other people but truly loving and accepting yourself first.

When you accept who and where you are now, you free yourself to grow and create meaningful change to your life in an authentic way and also it opens doors to more possibilities in life.

Most of us through no fault of our own are deeply engrossed on the day-to-day hustles and bustles of life, trying to make ends meet, running our various businesses and starting new paths for our careers. We are deeply engrossed in this until we forget who we really are,  we allow and rely on self-criticism as our principal motivational strategy.

It isn't a case of you either accept yourself OR you continue growing... you can feel good about who you are today with the knowledge that you are a work in progress, that you will continue growing and working toward an even truer version of yourself.

It is also about accepting that we have our own special place in this world. Feeling unloved and unworthy is a very lonely feeling.

Learning to love you is totally possible. To love and accept yourself you must challenge those negative feelings and thoughts inside.

Acknowledge that self-worth and self-acceptance are about the person you are, the person you are comfortable being around when everyone else has left and the person you are when you are alone.

At the end of the day even if we have family and friends - We really are all we have and we must cherish ourselves.

Take the time to sit and write all the things there is to love about YOU.

Be honest with yourself, no judgement, no criticism, if those critical thoughts do sneak up on you, acknowledge them and then let them pass through, replacing them with the authentic love you hold in your heart.

Do not let those negative thoughts hinder the process - this may take practice... with most things in life it is a process so focus on the journey not the destination.

Do these five things every day.

1. Write down positive qualities you possess and read them aloud to yourself often. 

2. Learn to self-care and do something every day that you enjoy. You deserve it! 

3. Look in the mirror and learn to love the person looking back at you and tell him or her every day that they are loved and why. 

4. Fill your life with people who love you and tell you often what a special person you are. Accept their words and their love without questioning it.

5. Remove all toxic people from your life - you do not need to accept that part.

Make a start - take small steps. 

The more self-acceptance you have, the more happiness you'll allow into your life....receive that love with gratitude and enjoy.

You deserve happiness.

Remember... 'You Are Reborn Each Day…'

Each day we can improve our self acceptance. 

I'd love to know what you thought of the post - what are your thoughts?  xxx